God loves this world so much that he sent me here

.....

2005-05-30T23:22:00.000-07:00

0000

it's mother day

2005-05-07T10:09:00.000-07:00

Hi Mom,
i love you.
you're the best...

i'm afriad.
but...
I grab the mic and grip it hard like it's my last time to shine

thought of the day--- "you wont die going a mile more."

life

2005-04-24T09:39:00.000-07:00

i am so flying without wings now...

chalet.

2005-04-19T06:48:00.000-07:00

yesterday was one of the nicest chalet i ever been to.

the prawns were fat and juicy.

the crabs smell terrific.

the satays were sweet.

the people were wild.

the beer taste great.

the whisky left me buring in the throat and stomach.

the sky was cloudy

and the memorys kept me going back.

thought of the day --- " yet again, the moon smiles upon me."

sweet thing.

2005-04-15T00:44:00.000-07:00

school in next week.
damn it!

from punk rock to ska
later to emo rock.
oh man now i am moving on to jazz and mambo.
ha, i truely know how to rock 'n' roll.

meeting Gin for dinner later.
and that 2 clowns for supper.
i think i seriously need to diet and exercise.

Colin, just you wait. soon i will be rampaging your province like how the tidal waves swept through the beaches.
just you wait man. you will be tripping soon.
very soon.

thought of the day --- "i got a bad feeling about this."

wordless

2005-04-11T07:36:00.000-07:00

something has changed me...

from the bottom of my heart.

2005-04-08T00:24:00.000-07:00

five shots couldnt drop me,
i took it and smile.

you are the head of the house,
you are our inspiration.
you brought us to where we are today,
from a blank piece of a paper, and with your years of knowledge.
you created wonders for us.
i respect you, dad.
happy birthday to you.

ranald began serving his ns yesterday.
best of luck in there, man.
protect your country, protect your mom, protect your dad but not your sis.
remember, a happy soldier is a good soldier.

no matter how far i go,
i just wanna let you know that
my heart remains with you.

thought of the day --- "AMICIZIA"

back from dead

2005-04-03T22:51:00.000-07:00

i was gone for a minute

and you niggaz expecting me
like how you expect jesus christ to rise from his death.
so expect me i'm back.

have been working my ass off for the past few days,
and finally got a day off to spend some quality time with my family.
my wife, my kids and my dog.
na... i mean my mom, my dad and my sis.

went genting highlands with ranald and desmond.
went there for the very first time.
once we checked into our room, we began jumping on the bed.
follow by calling people we seen names like "pork chop, lamp chop, mutu, lee chong chan and putatjan the go cart racer." and not forgeting the father bear, mother bear and the baby bear.
the coolest thing about the trip is i got a kiss from a girl.
was a sad kiss though, cos i never see her from then on.

here are some of the jokes we made back in genting

"i cant seem to find the M in the ringgit."
"this is the chinese ATM championship, isnt that putatjan. how did he get in here?"
"isnt that who i think he is, oh putatjan make it again."
while waiting for the rollar coaster ride, "you must understand the tolarance of the indian have, and you must salute the people around them too."
when looking at the people ready for the coaster, shouted "to hell they go."

my time seem to stop somehow.

thought of the day --- "leave me the way it has to be and excuse my poor excuse."

say goodbye

2005-03-26T08:17:00.000-08:00

alas....the once proud knight on his horse back collasped
and now buried under the runes.

was and then...

2005-03-22T21:38:00.000-08:00

woke up from a beautiful dream yesterday.
it was you and me on a date.
tried my best to make it last,
but the night wont last forever.

thank to those who have wished me.
thank you!

no one wants to grow old,
and no one can deny that.
me? i live forever.

damn now i am 2 decades old in this world.

you are the sweetest.
i am dying inside to hold you,
i cant do that.

thought of the day --- "i like you."

the last words

2005-03-21T08:57:00.000-08:00

what will you do,
when you have one day left of your teenage life?

let your hair fall and dance like there no tomorrow?
sing like no one is hearing?

i am afraid!

watch "the hostage" today.
awesome movie with an interesting plot.
love the cars in there.
and now i knew what it is like to be a GOD, when you are holding a gun.

are you my cinderella?
do you left me a slipper?
how can i reach you?

thought of the day --- "falls of a white rose, soon to be a man."

come what may

2005-03-18T08:18:00.000-08:00

exams are over,
isnt that great.
oh boy oh boy.

there so much things to do during the holiday.
a date with myself for almost everyday.
go for a hibernation for 30 days.
watching the simpsons everyday at starworld channel.
logging in utopia for every 2 hours.
and many more...
isnt that great.

is she the one?
she follows an elegant leads of an angel.
such beauty, such power.
i wish i can possess her too.

thought of the day --- "one man's trash is another man's treasure."

a penny for a thought

2005-03-14T06:34:00.000-08:00

so many stories to unfold,
yet something are better left unsaid.

abrupt deprivation of attention
results in severe depressive trauma.
never attempt ignorant beheaviour,
instead halt progression.
(but i can never do that.)

gamble with fate but never with a life at stake.

i guess i could never ignore her even though it a bliss.

HERE I GO

SCREAM MY LUNGS OUT, TRY TO GET TO YOU

YOU ARE MY ONLY ONE...

thought of the day --- " rudeness is tolerable. yet ignorance unforgiveable."

a hatch-ed egg.

2005-03-11T21:43:00.000-08:00

happy birthday to you, wei xian.

through this years,
i have learnt to be a better man.
i know of things that people of my age dont know.
i have a mind of little rascal to the corrupted mind of che guavera.
but i have a heart that fills with sympathy.
i could laugh the loudest but no one will notice me.
i wrote history and re write history that soon people will forget.
i think i have alot of friends but i dont hear from them.
i dont give a damn of how people judge me, and i never like places that infested of people.
i guess tax and death are the most people fear of, nevertheless we cant escape from that 2 things.

i believe that you are the most beautiful woman i've ever seen.

i sit and wait,
i am getting old too.
now i want you to come with me.

thought of the day --- "if you think that i'm strong, then you are wrong."

the queen of heart

2005-03-09T06:03:00.000-08:00

hell freezes over.

wasnt really sad,
but disappointed with myself.
i was totally prepared for it,
damn, nervous caught me unarmed
just to console myself
i guess everyone fail on the first attempt.
shit happens

"complacent led to self destruction."

like superman,
i was here for a reason
and the reason is you.

thought of the day --- "we all have our hidden side."

dont turn me away

2005-03-08T06:43:00.000-08:00

one more day to
hell loses free.
just one more day.

kinda down this few days,
too much plans laying ahead of me.
not too sure whether i can take them all.
"even a darkest knight, has his own fears."

my msn messenger is down with luck,
it is infected with virus.
no more late nights chat with you.
no more receiving pictures from you.
no more smiley from you.
:(

missing you gal,
missing you badly.

thought of the day --- "let the light from the lighthouse, let it shine on me."

a lost soul.

2005-03-06T07:28:00.001-08:00

almost sold my wife today.
sorry baby, i promised i aint gonna sell you.

watch HItch yesterday.
sat at lover seat with ranald.
dont worry, we are not gay.
nice show,
Will Smith never failed to impress me.
got a scene where they were kissing.
Ranald looked at me. i told him nono no...

nokia 7200, i must have you.

recently i kept listening to only you by yellowcard and girl dont know by keepsake.
ooo how much i love those song.

and homer simpsons, how much i loathe that guy.

everyday i love you.

thought of the day ---"mess with the best, die like the rest."

in your eyes

2005-03-04T03:55:00.000-08:00

cool it is friday today.
thats it,
wake me up when March end.

HIBERNATION in progress...

i feel sick,
it is because my cells are not working well?
i feel cold,
it is just i sold my soul?
i feel sad,
it is because someone die?
i feel disappointed,
it is because something went wrong?

i been loving you,
from a distance.

thought of the day --- "i'll never regret the things i've done."

ticket to indulgence

2005-03-02T08:21:00.000-08:00

had a dinner with ranald.
more like a wine feast.
we drank and ate like 2 kings,
but what was lack is the pretty girls dancing infront of us.
drink and drink and talk and talk,
till it time to say goodbye.

dad bought a printer today,
a laser somemore.
i not sure whether he strike lottery or something.
Anyow. girl, you were a day late.

7 more days to my driving test.
damn it.

i don't how should i feel.
but i was born to make you happy.

thought of the day ---"walk with me, and thou shalt never regret."

come on come on

2005-02-28T08:14:00.000-08:00

had a hair cut,
but i'm still looked stupid in it.

went for shirts hunt yesterday,
but nothing appeals me.
i wondered
how fussy can i be.

dad bought a new television set today.
however it goes well up into their room.
there goes my chance of owning a blackbox in my own room.
very well,
my time will come, my time will come.

heard Elvis today over a television programme by Ian Wright,
goes something like this
"wise man said, only fool rushes in.
but i cant stop falling in love with you."
yup no doubt Elvis is truely the king.
even though physically he is not with us,
but his spirit lives on among the stars.

like the song.
i cant stop falling in love with you, girl.

thought of the day --- "God had a dream, and it was me."

so sturdy, so straight

2005-02-27T07:51:00.000-08:00

it's been awhile since i last know you.
2 months to be exact.

but whether chatting, talking or msging.
you never failed to amuse me.
your smile,
your gorgeous beauty,
your 2 dimples
and your little sense of humour.

how much i enjoy them.

indeed you are,
sang like a rapture
and dance like a dervish.

thought of the day--- "they said that this love wasnt meant to be,2 people from 2 different wasnt suppose to be. it's must have been fate that you were sent to me."

gloomy evening

2005-02-24T03:39:00.000-08:00

100 friends are too few,
1 enemy is too many.

it seem the sky looks rather gloomy tonight,
the stars are hidden behind those smoky clouds.
the moon is not out to smile upon me.
but somehow it makes the night awkardly beautiful.

a friend of mine told me this today "your opportunity will come one day."
replied him "there are people good things happen to,
and there are people good things dont happen to. Thats how thing goes."

to you
i heart thee

thought of the day ---"somethings just don't matter anymore."

i feel so

2005-02-23T02:27:00.000-08:00

lyrics of box car racer- "i feel so" is running through my mind now

here how it goes

Sometimes
I wish I was brave
I wish I was stronger
I wish I could feel no pain
I wish I was young
I wish I was shy
I wish I was honest
I wish I was you not I

Sometimes
I wish I was smart
I wish I made cures for
How people are
I wish I had power
I wish I could lead
I wish I could change the world
For you and me

'Cause
I feel so mad
I feel so angry
I feel so callused
So lost, confused, again
feel so cheap

where do i go from here?

hey gal,
a little hiccup along the way should not bring you down.
you are a dancing queen.
feel the beat and dance your way out.
smile more :)
love it when you sulk too.

thought of the day ---"Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get."

always be there for you

2005-02-21T08:10:00.000-08:00

if i go crazy,
will you still call me Superman
if i am alive and well,
will you be there
Holding my hand
i'll keep you by my side
with my superhuman might.

haven really been myself lately.

thought of the day --- "i promise, i will."

a little of everything

2005-02-20T07:23:00.000-08:00

ranald --- "a bitch you are.'

joel --- "with friend like you who needs an enemy."

subhas --- "you bring darkness to my life."

julian --- " a great person."

carrot --- " try to grow more smarter."

lewis --- "it is bored to be normal, ya."

siongyan --- " you'll find your little dragon girl soon ."

jia rui ---" oh, you are a hard one."

jane --- "a friend in need is a friend indeed."

valarie --- "a lost friend."

moon --- " a dessert for a rose?"

shihui --- "a t.l.c friend."

ruiping ---" you the best i ever found."

i race against the time,
and i lost.

thought of the day ---"take me to the place i love, take me all away."

where art thou?

2005-02-19T08:38:00.000-08:00

to all the friends i used to have,
i miss the past.

everyday i dream of being big,
dream of growing taller among the others.
i'm crossing every lanes to meet my chance.
i dream of toasting with the sun and drink with the stars.
wearing booths and faded jeans, and ride on a horse back like those cowboys in texas.
i've turned every stones and leaves,
and still i ain't find what i am looking for.
i am going old trafford one day for sure, it is chanting my name louder and louder each day.
i have a dream house,
but it a matter of time when i am moving in.

i hate to grow old,
but if i were to.
i wanna grow old with you.

thought of the day --- "vultures break your wings and feast upon your flesh, do you still call the cop?"

like a candle in the wind

2005-02-18T08:38:00.001-08:00

felt like giving up and just drop dead.

but giving up?
that not my style.

instead, i will be like the Spartan warriors of those old days.
fight to one's last breath.

i know a man who once spoke words of wisdom.
and he told me,
"htat, i never said it will be easy,
as long as your heart desire you to.
go all out for it and never give up,
soon you will find yourself moving mountains and touching the skies."

like the saying in the story of Wizard of Oz,
"follow the yellow bricks road, and you will find the Queen."

have not been seeing much of my angel this few days,
wonder where could she be?
"and please... please don't go mad."

thought of the day ---"the world is a fine place, it is worth fighting for."

life like this?

2005-02-17T06:59:00.000-08:00

have you ever been exposed to the pleasure of an anonymous love?
have you ever walked through the valley of the shadow of death?
have you ever love a person and knowing you cant have her?
have you ever try to reach for the sky?
have you ever attempt to walk on water?
have you ever felt that you got too much responbilities on your shoulders that you cant hold on?
have you ever try to defy the law of physics by appearing 2 places at one time?
have you ever told a white lie?
have you ever made a perfect prank call that turn out to back fire you?
have you ever bought a stuff that you think it will be useful and turn to be a white elephant mocking at you from the stand?
have you ever walking or perhaps keep running for a distance and realising it leads you to nowhere?
have you ever try going against your principals, intregrity or maybe dignity?
have you ever felt like no one understands you, those shits and things you went through in your life?
have you ever tried taking pills and still it dont ease the pain?
have you ever made a couple of dollar bills and still you are unhappy?
have you ever felt like giving up?

i'm too depressed to go on...

thought of the day --- "i laughed the loudest, who would have known?"

something beautiful

2005-02-15T08:39:00.000-08:00

i caught a glimpse of an angel sleeping today.

nothing could describe how beautiful that was.

thought of the day --- "girl, i just wanna look into your eyes and watch the sunrise?"

a moment of folly

2005-02-14T07:26:00.000-08:00

i wanna quit school.
i wanna see the halley's comet before i die.
i wanna be a mathematician.
i wanna learn astronomy.
i wanna climb the himalayas.
i wanna experience the old trafford sensation.
i wanna make a trip around the caribbean islands.
i wanna tour de france.
i wanna fly.
i wanna walk on water.
i wanna eat all the food in the world,
and i wanna eat them twice.
i wanna see the niagara fall.
i wanna be knighted.
i wanna figure out the mystery of easter island.
i wanna know who killed kennedy.
i wanna know where do bad folks go when they die.
i wanna find out the mystery of black holes.
i wanna go as far as where pioneer 10 is going now.
i wanna be with her.

thought of the day --- "i know i can be what i wanna be, if i put my heart in it."

all that glitter

2005-02-13T07:46:00.000-08:00

all the glitter
might not be gold.

have you ever wonder
how this World might become,
if there is no such a thing called money.

i can't imagine.

Money
is the solution to all woes,
won't you tell me when love lasts buy you a shirt, a car maybe a meal?

yes, it's all about the GReen.
everything.
some work for the money. some make the money work for them.
all our life. we are working for it.
but never we know that MOney
how it has been mocking at us these fool human for years, decade or ages.

ME, i am an educated fool with money on my mind.

that came to my mind when i was working a few days ago.

the more i look at her.
the more i like her.

the more i like her
the more i know
i can't have her.

if ever there is such a word
"miracleous"
then i am afraid that the only thing
that can describe her

Maybe i am thinking too much. damn!

thought of the day. --- "loving her more each day."

a joy of festive

2005-02-09T03:48:00.000-08:00

2 more days.
just 2 more days,
for her return.
soon the flowers will begin to bloom,
and the folks will be out dancing.

Happy lunar new year to all.

Gong Xi Fa Cai
may everyones' hong baos tally
reach the projected quota this cocky year.

asked ranald somthing stupid yesterday.
"why do dolnuts have hole in the center?"

his answer was,
"this world is make up of sticks and balls,my dear friend."

sound logic?
what do you guys think?

thought of the day --- "nothing, but missing her."

there went the world.

2005-02-06T08:44:00.000-08:00

i have a beautiful dream yest night.
i dreamt of her.
she gave me wings,
she makes me wanna fly...

but still...
hanging on every words she said.

to my sister,
though what you wrote in the tag board is lame.
AnyHow, i still love you...

work was fun today,
everything seem great,
everybody happy.

something is driving me insane in my membrane.
"what should i do?
it getting nowhere."
damn it.

Thought of the day --- "i felt the hate rise up in me, knee down and clear the stone or leaves, i wonder out where you can be, inside my shell . i wait and bleed."

no title

2005-02-05T05:10:00.000-08:00

have i told you lately?
that i love you...

very soon it'll be chinese new year.
the year of chicken.

i guess i would have to eat less chicken this year.
everywhere you see is full of chinese new year decorations,

homer simpsons must be thinking
"why do these chinese fools celebrating new year in the mid of february?"

oh well, look like i am one of those fools.

no chicken, then more fish.

i like to eat fish.
not sure why too,
maybe because of the old jewish joke saying
"eat more fish, and you'll get smarter"

thought of the day --- "how ironic can one life gets"

all the small thing

2005-02-03T09:42:00.000-08:00

i like her smile.

very unusual about it.

and she got a dimple.

nothing really great happen

other than i'm able to live through today.

feeling very eerie now.

my mom brought home a doll, a huge one instead.

now she is staring at me. i'm afraid she will walk around the house later at night.

and maybe, maybe i might find a knife at my throat when i am awake.

Thought of the day --- "keep on smiling, because i am falling in love with it."

its never get easier

2005-02-02T06:52:00.000-08:00

i miss her.

i miss her even more.

we lost 7-2 to singapore chinese association team.

but

Man U won 4-2.
glory glory man united glory glory man united,
and the red goes marching on...

nothing beats the good old times spent with my sec sch frenz just now.

with all the misery put aside,
i ended my day with a glass of martell.

Thought of the day --- "the moon smiles upon me on this darkest night of mine"

better off dead

2005-02-01T07:19:00.000-08:00

This morning, i woke up i found my life is in a mess. i turned around and asked God why?
He replied "son, thats not for going church."

Everything doesn't seem to be going the right way for me today.

1. my province in utopia was rampaged 4 times by 4 different provinces of the same kingdom.
2. was very late for my efma lecture.
3.forgot to bring money for driving.
4. having some troubles with my project groupmates.

"They say that every man bleeds just like me
And I feel like number one
Yet I'm last in line.
Everybody knows my name.
They say it way out loud.
A lot of folks fuck with me
It's hard to hang out in crowds.
I guess that's the price you pay
To be me."

--- Kids Rock

oh well, i guess every dogs have its own day.

But her smile is all that needed to make my day. :)

Though of the day ---> "shit happens, i guess i'll have to live with it."

lets there be light

2005-01-31T09:23:00.000-08:00

well this it is. my first entry. i guess everyone will gave an introduction of themselves on their very first entry.

This is how mine goes. you'll have to read between the lines to have a better understanding of the kind of things and shits that i am going through now.

Within the wooden palisade fences of the Taranu Pe encampment, a lone figure
towered above all else. Donning on a majestic thorn armor that gleamed under
the sunlight and clutching a rusted blade in both hands, the man proved himself
victor of one gruesome blood bath history has ever witnessed. The air was heavy
with mist, thick with the stench of death and night was creeping close. Amidst the
pile of corpses, a half charred banner stood rooted into the hardened earth and he
looked around, while
the northen winds carried its flakes into the far reaches of the orange horizon where
a maiden peered out her window, awaiting her lover's return.

it tells everything of my life i am in now. and thank to Ranald for a little help in the above paragraph .

Thatall for today, another story for another day then.

Thought of the day ---> "read between the lines"